Blogs got me started, because I didn't understand why people would rather go look at virtual "pages" about each other than write each other real personal letters in handwriting. Or give each other a phone call and talk with their real voices. Or even . . . "go visiting" or have a maple syrup party like the Wilders/Ingalls did when they wanted to socialize.
So we went from physically visiting each other to phone calls to emails (which became too lengthy). So it was text messages or Twitter. Or MySpace or Facebook, or just driving around the internet visiting people's blogs, where you don't have to interact at all; just put up your stuff and read other people's stuff and somehow, you feel connected. Even instant messaging can be multitasked or ignored. Does anyone else feel the superficiality of some of this? I miss real people!
Real friendships are not made or kept by clicking "confirm."
Friday night Jason & Ben stayed home with our 9 children so that Julie & I could go out for supper. When she lived in town, she & the girls would drive over on their tractor mower for a visit. Now that she's moved, we call or email sometimes and visit a snatch at church, but we haven't just hashed things out for quite awhile. We went to Ruby Tuesday and ate our meals and drank many refills of water with lemon, and talked. Face to face in a tiny booth where we could hear each other's tones of voice and see each other's facial reactions and without even realizing it, we'd been there almost 4 hours!
Now, everybody's not as intense as I am (I don't like to shoot the breeze). But that evening just meant so much more to me than spending an afternoon "socially networking."
Here are the pros and cons of Facebook, etc. as I see it:
PROS:
- people will talk to me on Facebook that would never ever call or write
- it is easier to look up someone on FB than hunting their address or phone #
- people can catch up at each other's convenience without having to plan a time/place
- we can see photos of people we wouldn't be able to visit
- it's free, fun, and it's not just for teenagers
CONS
- friendship is reduced to click click (not even clique)
- all the fakeness is taken so seriously (fake pokes, fake food fights, fake gifts, fake top friends lists, fake games with fake prizes, fake groups, fake shouting matches . . . )
- i do not care that so-and-so just got up from a nap/hates work/is a fan of ___/went outside/came in/blah blah blah, and they don't really care that i did either
- it's just a new toy, and pretty soon something else will replace it
My nephew has over 400 "friends" on facebook. I hope that he has one or two real friends.
Posts
Sade, no matter what, you are a good blogger. :) Thanks for sharing your thoughts - I agree. :)
ReplyDeleteMiss you - and I find myself almost daily saying or thinking, "I wonder what Sadie does about ___."
Hugs :)
Sadie, no matter what, you're a great blogger! Thanks for sharing your thoughts - I agree. :) Miss you, and almost daily I find myself thinking or saying, "I wonder what Sadie would do about____ ." Hugs :)
ReplyDeleteThis is all so true! I see certain advantages (for us who live far away from some friends and family it's a great possibility to upload pictures of the kids and also to stay updated on what's going on in people's lives) but I so agree with what you said. If you think about it, the streets in your neighbourhood look deserted - no kids are playing there, they are all sitting inside in front of their computers. Like you, I also went out for dinner with a friend not too long ago, and when we looked at the clock, 5 hours had passed and the waiters were ready to kick us out. So we got out and went into a café instead to continue talking. Nothing beats that! However, I do hope that you will continue blogging so that we can get a sneak peak of what's going on in your lives. Of course, you are also always welcome to stop by for a visit!!! :-)
ReplyDeletePatricia Pischke
Oh Sadie . . . really how can all this non communication be so difficult to take? After all, after anonymously reading your blog, I can anonymously make a comment about it!
ReplyDeleteBut I wont. I would rather say, in defense of an internet life that while it never takes the place of the here and now, neither would I want it to remove me from the traffic jam that is building up outside our living room windows, it does give us a wonderful connection, which is what you were saying anyway.
The scariest part is that our daughter has this "internet talking" all figured out and knows exactly what is going on and who she is talking too.
Love you,
Jon
Ah, common Sadie, it isn't all that bad. I couldn't keep up with what happening at CBI without facebook or keep up with Ben White or other people that live ages away. It's a fun way to keep in contact. If you wanna talk face-to-face just say so and we'll git 'er done. :) see ya soon (:
ReplyDeleteThat is all so true! I couldn't agree more. I see certain advantages to Facebook and blogs (for us who live far away from some friends and family it's a good way to upload pictures of our kids etc) but just because I have a Facebook "friend" doesn't make him or her my real friend. If you think about it, the streets in your neighbourhood probably look deserted - there are no kids playing outside, they are all sitting inside in front of their computers. Like you, I also went out for dinner with a friend of mine not too long ago, and we suddenly realized that we had been sitting at the restaurant for 5 hours and the waiters were ready to kick us out. We then left and went into a café instead to continue talking. Nothing beats that! However, with all that said, I do hope that you will continue blogging - for us living so far away, it's a great possibility to follow your every day lives!
ReplyDeletePatricia Pischke
Sadie, I looked at the title, scrolled down, and laughed. Aw Sadie. I love you. And this blog just suddenly reminded me of Gramma J.
ReplyDeleteBut you're right and I agree, but I'm also addicted.
oh well.
luv, the Schniz
I was talking to a mentor friend a few weeks ago, and I told her about this blog post. She reminded me that we are to use these media outlets not for rants, but to serve people. She asked me how my articles are serving anyone, or am I just adding to all the rest of the self-centered fodder that's out there? She wondered if I'm sharing the life message God has given me or just spewing opinions. Guilty, Guilty, and Guilty. Thank You Lord, for iron-sharpening friends.
ReplyDelete